you
by my otp's are ruining my life
Summary: inspired by the episode 7x17 please give this story a chance since i would write a summary if knew how to... ugh i really suck at summaries... but promise that the story is good...
1. STUPID

**Disclaimer: the tv show supernatural isn't mine so please don't sue i have no money anyways... i'm just doing this for sake of destiel.**

**authors note: this is my first story so i will very appreciate critical comments and comments in general please rewiew since it make me know that people are interested. i deleted my prievious story love will find a way this is the same story... just changed the title.**

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><p>-…Stupid…<p>

**Kensas, Texas, 2013**

Dean's ~p.o.v~

"No!" with a jerk Dean woke up. Heart pounding fast . Breathing ragged . With clammy hands he wiped the sweat out of his face. it didn't help . His face is still sweaty; Dean thinks he added more. He doesn't care .

Body hunched, crossed legged, hands covering his face. Sweat filling up his nostrils . Breathing in and out trying to calm himself. It doesn't work. He smells of sweat . He doesn't care . He tries to breathe in once more, this time he achieves. Not by much.

For a moment Dean just stays like that. Face down, body hunched and he allows it. To stay like that . To shelter himself, to appear as weak, vulnerable. The moment's over . He straightens his back.

Dean's back to _himself_ again. He looks over to the other bed and lets out a relieved sigh. Sam's still asleep; Dean didn't wake him… that's good… since he really, _really _doesn't want to talk about what happened... not now, or to be frank ever ... And knowing his brother he will surely want to talk about it… And that's not good… Not for Sam and especially not for Dean's emotional state. Tough to be honest Dean's emotional state has been pretty fucked up ever since Cas died four years ago. Well _even more _so…

Dean shakes his head, tries to clear away the direction of where his thoughts were taking him, it works. he knows that it won't last long it never does… His thought's and his thoughts in general always, _always _has a way of catching up to him but it's okay.. He's okay for now… And that's all it matters.

Not knowing what to do, he looks up at the ceiling for some sort of inspiration. His mind goes blank.

But he does know one thing. And that is that he shouldn't be nowhere near this place, with a grunt he moves of the bed and gets his jacket, boots as quietly as he can, not wanting to wake Sam up. With a final look at his brothers sleeping form he closes the door of some crappy motel room behind him.

Dean passes the impala and just keeps going. He's used to traveling long distances on foot, and can feel the familiar comfort of the black night covering him up like a second skin.

Head down, hands in his pockets not really paying attention of the direction of where he was heading, or to be frank not really caring. And before he knows it Dean finds himself on top of a hill, tall grass around him left to grow unattended.

He looks up at the sky and the first thought to come to mind is that it's beautiful. Clear black sky, dozens of stars shining like little diamonds.

For a brief moment, Dean wonders if Cas is up there '_watching over him' _he chuckles at how silly the thought was. It really, _really_ was stupid. But for some reason that he can't comprehend the thought is stuck there in his brain. _Well_ it's not like it's impossible. No one does know where angels end up after they die, so ya it could be very possible for one of those stars to be Cas… Watching over 'humanity' like some creep.

And the thought makes him …

Feel …

Bitter… Angry… He wants to scream.

Dean wants to yell out. Yell out that Cas is a stupid fucking bastard. Yell out that he hates him, Hates him so _soo_ much for leaving him like everyone else that he cares about. Yell out that he needs Cas to be here...

And you know what.

He does.

Dean screams. He screams his lungs out. He screams about everything that he thinks about. Everything he hates about Cas. Everything that could have gone alright if Cas wasn't stupid. That he was there, always there… if Cas just needed him.

Knees on the ground, body arched, face up at the sky.. a prayer position.. Dean searches and searches for the shiniest star. Dean thinks he found the one. The star is quite small he thinks but somehow it out showed every other star

"I miss you…"

His voice came out gruff, wrecked. Dean couldn't help the small smile that came up. He kinda sounds like Cas.

He's still in the same position when rain started pouring down.

Dean doesn't move, doesn't want to move. He doesn't know how long he was stayed there. Hour's maybe. Rain pounding on his head, back.. He feels cold.. He doesn't care, he feels comforted in weird sort of way.

When Dean does get up. His body is sore, everything hurts not that he was surprised.

Dean walks back to the motel, but this time he takes in the surroundings around him, it's nothing special. Bushes in his left and right, a couple of head lights on both side of the road, lots of rubbish around a rubbish bin. Cars passing on his right, it's nothing special, but it just soo _normal_. It gets to him, he doesn't like it. _Everything _ is so normal… It's like nothing changed. Dean knows that in rational mind he shouldn't feel hostile about the situation.

But he does…

Mostly everyone in his life dies or leaves or is left behind. He hates it, hates being a hunter, being a hunter is the cause of basically every problem in his life, hates the situation that he's in. Since he knows that if he doesn't have hunting he doesn't have anything. Well except for Sam and Bobby other than them he would off have nothing… After all he only has six bucks to his name…

Face up looking up at the sky Dean finds that it's morning. He feels cold, he didn't notice it before but he does now and it's freezing. Rubbing his hands together, trying to get rid of the numbness in his hands, it kinds of hurts due to the how stiff they were, after a few solid minutes of intensive rubbing, Dean can start to feel his hands come back to life.

Face down, hands in his pockets, kicking a few stray rocks in path way, Dean walks back to the direction of where the motel is.

Dean finds his way back to the motel of where he and Sam were staying around seven in the morning. He reaches for the door knob and jerks back away immediately the door basically snaps open.

Sam's there, hair messed up, eyes wide... Sam looks… weird

"_Where the hell have you been?!" _

"No just went out for a walk" trying to walking past him but was blocked by Sam's frame, what he said was completely true but somehow he still manages to feel guilty. Great.

"_Really cause you look like hell"_

"It was raining when I came back .. So I'm gonna to take a shower"

"_You do realise that we need to ta-"_

"No. We. Don't. " Empathising each word as he stood his ground, not wanting back down from his brother who does'nt seem to be backing down at any moment. What else is he supposed to do? Since clearly he can't get take a peaceful shower like he desperately wanted to do.

Feeling like this is enough. Dean pushes past him a little bit harder than strictly necessarily, but he doesn't really care. Anything to get out of this conversation.

"_Dean"_

"Sam" his voice final. But he could tell that Sam wanted to argue but something stopped him.

"_Yea okay…" _it came out as defeated sigh

With that, Dean went straight to the bathroom and closed the door behind him. He looked at the mirror in front of him and_ wow_ Sam was right. He does look like hell; Dean basically looks like a drowned rat.

He turns on the tap with a sigh, he splashed cold water on his face. Everything's mixed up in his head, he doesn't like it. He doesn't like letting his emotions control him, Dean usually always, always has a hold on his emotions, he feels like he's going to burst any moment and he'll scream, scream louder, longer than today and he's afraid that maybe next time he won't be able to stop. Ugh when did everything get so messed up… Oh right three years ago…

He steps into the shower and turns on the faucet. Warm water meets his body, the water slowly loses the muscles on his back , it's not the best water temperature but it'll do, Dean leans back on the bathroom wall, eyes closed slowly letting is mind go blank for few hours. He sighs…


	2. where am i ?

Disclaimer: I do not. I repeat I do not own the TV show spn it belongs to the rightful owners and writers and what not. I AM NOT getting any profit of this; it is purely for my enjoyment and hopefully yours…

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><p>Colorado, Denver, U.S 2010<p>

Castiel's ~p.o.v~

His eyes open. He closes them back not. Not enjoying the sensation.

He feels a heavy dampness on his lower region. The upper region is covered in something warm and lumpy and smells something of earth

He thinks of nothing.

He is still. He likes the position that he is in, the dampness that he is currently feeling is warm and is pleasant he thinks.

The wetness soon feels unpleasant, scratching? He does not like the position that he is in anymore, he wishes to move nothing happens.

He is struggling now. Moving side to side. And has a feeling of panic. _Why is nothing happening?_ He stops doing what he was currently doing, it was nothing of help.

He is a little deeper on earth and the heavy dampness is slowly going to his upper region. He clenches his eyes a little more tightly and tries to breathe in trough his mouth. He coughs vigorously, he breathed in some of the mud, and he let out a noise that he doesn't comprehend. He tries to move once more this time he uses hands. It felt quite unusual to depend on a pair of limbs he thinks. He curls his hands against the mud and forces himself to rise but to no avail he falls back down once. This is irritating he thinks. He breathes in this time, thankfully he somehow managed to block out the mud; he tries again and senses a light feeling in his chest a feeling accomplishment he thinks, when he finally found the strength to turn over.

He stays in the same position that he was in before, even though he now understands the concept of movement, he still chooses stay in his current position bearing the scratching feeling; he could tolerate the feeling for a little longer.

Hesitant to open his eyes since the last he did the feeling was not pleasant. But since he was getting tired of the steady darkness behind his eyes, heat on his eyelids suggesting there's something more, making up his decision. He scrunched his eyes so that he could try to open them; it appeared to be a more difficult task than he had imagined given that they felt like they were permanently glued together. Clenching his eyes before he tried to open his eyes once more thankfully his struggle did not go unnoticed since his eyes were now open without struggle, but closed them back immediately, due to the sudden heat of light, he open his eyes, blinking ever so slightly adjusting his vision

He was greeted in colour; he understands the concept of colour.

Tilting his head to his right he blinks, taking in the surrounding's above him it was quite a pleasant sight to see blue and white colliding together with the occasional winged creature? Flying above. It really was a lovely sight he thinks. He attempted to rise but it seemed to be a more challenging task than opening his eyes, with a few falls he managed to stay in the upright position, tough highly drawn to the temptation of gravity, looking at the sight in front of him all he seemed to see was a lake. That does explain the previous dampness,he thinks.

Looking down he saw mud then he saw feet and a figure… _his figure_… he suppose. He currently has little pieces of leaves stuck to him, mud and patches of dried liquid red liquid, curious he went down to touch it, it felt like it looked. Dry. The red liquid slightly covered his hands, using his thumb to stroke the dry liquid between his fingers. The action was only done for a moment before he brang it up to his nose, he immediately flinched back… the smell was something he cannot describe but it was not the earthly smell of mud.

Looking around shakily, the sight in front of him, tall trees surrounding him, some cut out logs, he stopped turning, when he saw two small figures on the grass, the two figures were covered in light brown hair, a bushy tail, brown almost black looking eyes which seemed to be bigger than its head, a squirrel he thinks, the squirrels were playing with each other. Transfixed by the only beings, walking towards them hoping to ask where he was. To his disappointment the squirrels ran away sensing his presence.

_How did he get here?_

_Where is he?_

_What has happened to him?_

_Why can't he remember anything?_

_Who is he?_

Blindly walking to a direction with no destination, mind complete of unanswered questions.

He tried to shake the piling thoughts that were nesting in his mind away, since it was causing a sharp ache in his head, looking around to see where he is, somehow he managed to reach a hill tall grass around him left to grow unattended he was about to turn and walk elsewhere but a glare of shining light stopped him, looking at the direction of where the light was, he saw a pole. curious he walks towards the pole stumbling ever so slightly due to the litter of rocks appearing on his pathway. When he reached the pole, a hexagon sign covered in red except for the **STOP** which was in huge white letters, it did nothing to ease his confusion _why was the sign saying stop?_, looking down tilting his head at what was underneath him, a centimetre away . the solid rock, curious he stepped on it was not the same feeling as the mud which had warmth and softness the flat rock was… flat… hard.. It wasn't comfortable nor was it comfortable. Cement he thinks, walking on the cement not knowing what else to do, walking blindly; sorting all the questions in an alphabetical order to ask if he finds help.

He walked a couple of steps more before he doubled over in pain clutching his head.

_I would've died for you-_

_Our father in heaven, please forgive us-_

_Don't make me lose you to-_

_Dear lord, I wish-_

_Castiel you let a demon-_

Prayers, screams like glass shattering into a million little shards piercing through his ears, _what is happening to him?_ He tries to think, tries to get up but before he could do such an action. A vehicle of some sort is coming towards him, paralysed in his position looking looking looking as the vehicle comes closer and closer, it was making loud noises probably a warning, it does not influence his trans like state. He felt the vehicle crash into bones. Not enough time to let out a sound.

His vision was black once more

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><p><strong>Reviews will be lovely<strong>

**I know that there's a lot of 'he's' but that's only because Castiel doesn't know who he is yet and I'm writing it in his perspective and he doesn't know who he is yet so if can't just Cas woke up so and so since then it means that he knows he's Castiel know what I mean? So yea...**

**what i was thinking when writing the squirrel paragraph was the scen when cas was interogating the cat... i can't remember the episode but the epi was about cartoon robber and dean and cas were like a married couple... you know the scene... ya anyway so i tought it would be a very cas thing to do hoped you like the paragraph!**

**also this is a continued fic where i will be switching p.o.v's of cas and dean and very rare sam ones, the next chapter will be updated in a week or so... probably in a week...**

**p.s when people talk i will use slang for one so that it can be differenated i guess also i will use slang for thought or something particular in spn... basically what i'm trying to say is that i use alot of slang **

**Again, please review because it will help a lot tell me what you think about ithe story and not that hard to rewiew like in ao3 where you have to sighn in with email and stuff is super easy and everyone can do, and you can also put a fake name if rewiewing makes you uncomfortable or something**

**Xoxo**

**Nikki**


	3. leaving

_**Disclaimer: i do not own the tv show supernatural or the characters, I also do not make profit of this which btw is quite sad I AM ONLY DOING THIS FOR MY ENJOYMENT FOR DESTIEL WOOO! DESTIEL!**_

_**pp.'s : **__**Also for Harold Allen I'm picturing Robert de niro to be his character**_

**this is the picture that I think will acts more like his character in a way :**

** except a little more seriously**

**p.s no beta so all mistakes are my own please escuse them **

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><p>this is the picture that I think will acts more like his character in a way :<p>

except a little more seriously

Chap 1

" Why did you bring him here!?"

"_Where else could I bring him!?"_

"Oh, I don't know, maybe the frickin hospital!"

" _I'm sorry, okay! I just panicked!."_

"So you bring a naked man to our coach!"

The man in question an unpleasant noise, trying to block out the noise coming two feet's away. Turnover to the other side which made him scrunch his face in a pained motion, so he turned back to the position that he was once before, making him realize that he was lying on a soft surface.

"_Papa, he's awake!"_

He felt gruff, muscled hands, shaking his head, making him feel slightly dizzy

"C_an you_ hear me?" a strong voice was waiting to be answered, he strained to answer back, but the only thing escaping his mouth was a groan

Subsequently a short while after he opened his, eyes and like before his vision went bleary, this time tough; he adjusted his sight quickly, or perhaps it was due to being in a sheltered area. His moved his head straight to the direction where the voice is coming from, It was a man with military styled light brown hair, a wrinkled face with a kind yet hard brown eyes _" can you hear me?"_ the man asked again, he opened his mouth to answer, nothing happened. Frowning, closing his mouth and opening once more to answer, the voice came out as a squeak.

He cleared his throat; it hurts he thinks. As he tries again

"Where am I?" it came out with a croak.

"_What do you mean?"_

" I do not know where I am"

"_You're in Denver County, Colorado, America. What do you actually remember son?" _the man asked, scrunching his bushy eyebrows together frowning

" I remember waking up half in the lake…. And getting hit by some vehicle"

"_yea you can thank my daughter for that"_

"_Papa!" a young lady snapped _he didn't pay attention to her until now, she sustained a nice round pale face, with full pale pink lips and a pointy nose. But unlike her father, she only had kindness in her light brown eyes. He could sense a gentle aurora around her.

The young lady's pale face sustained a sudden pink colour when she looked at him

"I'm so soo sorry! I wasn't paying attention and then when I did I tried to stop but my break wasn't walking an-"

"_your face. Why is it pink?" _the question seemed to make the young lady's face a darker shade of pink. He looked at her fascinated only turning to face the man when he asked him a question.

"You know what your name is?"

_"I think it is Cas... Castiel"_ C_astiel _it seemed to be a quite a strange name, saying the name over again through his head it just simply felt right.

His head felt somewhat better and is no longer feeling like he's spinning in circles, his head still felt light headed but it was manageable, he looked at the man and his daughter muttering to each other about him judging by the glances he keeps on generating from them. Castiel felt grateful that they hadn't allowed him to be left on the side of the road by himself and that they took charge of him, but he felt like it was time to depart from them and start looking for information about how he got here and why he cannot remember anything.

"I shall be leaving now.. Thank you for not leaving me on the side of the cement floor and checking if I was alright" he attempted to get up and leave, but immediately fell back on the couch wincing since his ribs felt like it was on fire. He sat on the couch trying to breath, but it only came out in a fit of coughs.

"You're not going anywhere until you get better okay." The response was from the daughter.

Castiel looked at her father silently waiting for what he had to say, he just simply nodded back to show his approval of his daughter's decision.

And with that Castiel laid back on the couch and settled into a comfortable position and fell into a blissful slumber almost instantaneously.

_**Nine months later...**_

Castiel has been living with the Allen family for over nine months, he was never expecting this turn of events when getting hit by a car seven months ago. It does feel strange to be a part of _their_ family, but none the less, Castiel felt very great full towards them.

But he must admit that he does not consider them to be his family even if he has no other comparasion. Tough he feels like there is a family where he belongs to. Whenever the tought comes to mind it always manage to make him feel guilty, ungrateful, after all they have done for him, and here he is looking for something that may never exist.

Throughout the nine months that he has been here, Castiel has been attempting to regain his memories with the help of Daphne and Harold. But so far all Castiel has managed to regain was some ere of battle and combat, he must of have some sort military background…. It makes sense he thinks since he kept on having dreams of being called a commander.

It is frustrating not knowing anything else but at least he has some clue of who he once was . he applied to military academies. Hoping that if he does that he might get more memories of his past,

It was Harold's idea for him to apply to military academies; Castiel was unsure at first but soon was persuaded into applying.

Castiel got accepted to the United States Military Academies and has graduated after eight months, which was a shock to everybody including himself since it takes 4 years to graduate. He is to departure to Vietnam next month.

Harold and Castiel has been bonding over the fact that Harold was a retired soldier,

Harold talks about his time in the war and his 'glory days', Castiel doesn't say much preferring to listen; occasionally talking about what he remembers

_**One month later...**_

It was almost night time when Castiel was currently packing his clothes since he was due to go to Vietnam tomorrow, he is looking forward to it, hoping that he will gain more memories or visions of his past of who he was.

When he completed packing all of his clothing in a suitcase that was borrowed from Daphne, he went downstairs. Greeted by Harold by the front porch

"_How was your packing?"_

"It went very well, I have packed all the things that is to be needed" Castiel responded while sitting in a chair beside Harold

"_You know in 1950 Korea was conflicting with the United States, causing violence I was twenty two, then when this happened and it also was my first time ever to contribute , I was pissing myself with nerves to do this, I remember seeing all these other young men my age who also volunteered and they all looked just as nervous_ and scared" Harold stopped at that looking into the night looking like he was getting caught up with his in his memories. It happens sometimes.

" _I know how Daphne feels about you" _this time Harold was looking back at him, "_I know that she's in love with you" _Castiel felt his body tense waiting for Harold to continue he didn't, _couldn't_ speak when Harold didn't speak for a long time, Castiel assumed he was waiting for an answer, but Castiel doesn't know how to respond so he didn't say anything at all and just nodded looking back at the sky Harold didn't say anything back and went back to looking at the sky. After a long moment of silence it was starting to feel stiff, he doesn't know if he should leave or stay…

"_Can you bring me a beer?" _Harold asked and Castiel quickly obliged and almost ran to the fridge to try to get away from the quickly becoming tense atmosphere, he drew the beer from the fridge and set the beer on the counter and stayed there for a while, not ready to approach him again since he doesn't know what to say. It would of been easier if Castiel felt the same way and he knows that Harold would happily bless their relationship.

But given that it was not the case he doesn't know how to say that he didn't feel those emotions for his daughter. He tried to feel those emotions for Daphne but he just simply couldn't. His heart just 'wasn't in it' as they say. he feels like he's holding on to something, some one…

Still not deciding on what to say, he went back to the porch and was greeted of a sleeping man.

"Harold, I think it will be better if you slept on your bed" Castiel murmured shaking Harold to wake him up, when he didn't respond he shook again Harold still haven't woken up or didn't look like he was going to wake up any time soon, making Castiel worry he shook harder making. Harold rolled over the chair falling to the ground.

"Harold. You. Need. To. Get. Up." Castiel stated firmly with every word he spoke, he crouched down to gently shake Harold again deeply hoping that what he was assuming was wrong. When Harold still didn't respond to his touch he shakily looked for Harold's pulse and when he did find it. It was nothing, absolutely nothing, no sign of life. Castiel closed his eyes for a moment clearing his throat before he calls the ambulance.

The ambulance arrived in the next twenty minutes Castiel told them what happened and then they took Harold away the next task thing he had to do was incredibly difficult. He needed to call Daphne.

After a few rings she picked up

"_Hello?" _came a reply when Castiel didn't reply immediately Daphne imitated her 'hello' that she said a minute ago.

"Daphne this is Castiel I'm sorry that I'm calling you when you're working, but this is concerning Harold so you need to come home immediately"

" _Is papa alright, what happened to him?" _came an erratic response. Castiel heard shuffling noises indicating that Daphne was moving to get up he could almost see the frown on her face

"It would be better if you come here when I tell you," he stated seriously signifying that there no room for argument and judging by the sigh Daphne knows that too.

"_Okay, okay, I'll be there as soon as I can. But-"_

"Daphne please just come" Castiel cut her off with a sigh and ended their phone call he ran his hand through his face looking up the sky which at most nights always comforted him. Today wasn't supposed to be like this… It was supposed be Harold talking about his past and both of them drinking a beer for a little while, he was meant to get a handshake from him and a 'good luck for tomorrow' and a hug from Daphne. Today wasn't supposed to end like this.

He was pacing when he heard the frantic knocking. He took a breath before he walked in the direction where the door is headed. When he opened the door before he even could let a word out Daphne was rushing in and was talking frantically

"_Where's papa-"_

"Daphne"

"_Is he alright, I-"_

"Daphne!"

This time Daphne finally stopped talking and for the first time when she got here she looked at him looking a little bit taken back and he doesn't blame her given that he has never once risen his voice before

"_Castiel where is he"_

"_Where is my father Castiel"_ Daphne looked straight him with worry and slight desperation

"He's dead. He died due to a heart attack i called the ambulance before i called you i'm sorry" was the murmured reply he couldn't look at her when he said it not wanting to see the heartbreak on her face.

When he finally had the courage to look at her, she was crouching down hands wrapped around her slim frame face down and shaking violently. He walked up to her and put his hand on her shoulder to comfort her which was instantly smacked away.

"_Don't touch me!" _she yelled at him backing away from him with tears dripping from her eyes and her head shaking like she is trying to deny what he had said. When he was walking towards her, it only caused her to walk back faster when Castiel reached her Daphne was pressed back to the wall looking so vulnerable and helpless and all he wanted to do was comfort her to say it was okay. But it's not. None of this is okay.

" Daphne-"

"_No, please don't say it Castiel please" _Daphne was scrunching his top since she was holding it tightly begging viciously for him to deny it…. to say that he was lying and Castiel did… he really wanted to say it but he couldn't. He just simply couldn't.

"I'm sorry-" before he even could finish his sentence he was attacked by a hug she was sobbing hysterically in his shoulder, he stood there stiff not exactly sure what to do since he was never in this situation with anyone before, he stood still with hands on his sides after a long moment .he gradually extended his arm and slowly put it around her.

This form of action only made Daphne cry harder and to hold on tighter he slowly rubbed her back in which he hoped will be a soothing motion and it appeared that it did since she stopped crying, she stood there for a long moment still embracing him, which became uncomfortable for Castiel but he still stood there not wanting to get out the hug just in case if she would cry again.

Daphne still in his embrace looked up at him for a long minute before she kissed him, in surprise and and instinct he pushed her away stumbling back slightly; looking at her in shocked

"Daphne we shouldn't-"

"_Please let me have this Castiel" _she cut him as she stepped closer to him looking dejected, lonely and desperate for some sort of physical attention, he went up to her, slowly but hesitantly kissed back it didn't feel right to do this, but who was he to not give her the comfort that she desperately seeks?

Daphne kissed back eagerly he continued with the act.

He slowly backed her to her bedroom taking her clothes off and kissing her neck when she moaned he did it again and now was laying her on her back kissing her softly, hesitantly

:

:

:

When he woke up the next day he was covered with Daphne's naked frame she looked peaceful, calm, last night was a mistak given the circumstances but he was happy that he could comfort her, but today was the day that he was to depart for Vietnam he wished he didn't have to leave today , he gently woke Daphne up

"Daphne" when he didn't get a response from her he said her name again, this time she stirred around for awhile she stopped moving looking like she was about to get up, he waited for her to get up patiently and when she did she immediately looked at him and she gave a small sad smile

"_Hello" was the sleepy response_

"I am to depart to Vietnam today," he said there's no point in easing her into it, he had to leave… Daphne looked unhappy but she also looked understanding about the situation , he couldn't blame her since he was to leave her to her grief of her dead father alone…

"_Do you need any help packing"_

" No, I already packed everything all I need to do is get dressed and..." he trailed of not wanting to finish off his sentence, Daphne sighed and nodded back sadly he turned over and got out of the bed he felt uncomfortable being naked he hurriedly put on his clothing and left not looking back as he closed the door behind him… when he reached his bedroom he got his suitcase and now was walking forward to the door when he looked back Daphne wasn't there he shouldn't of been surprised… it was a good decision…. Closing the door behind him as he calls a taxi…

Like before i will love feedback or constructive critism

**the next chapter will probably be updated in two weeks so yea or not who knows ;)**

**Castiel has been limiting his relationship with Daphne not wanting to encourage Daphne's feeling towards him, not knowing how tell her that he has no feelings for her or maybe he does but it's too selfish to do so, he doesn't want to leave this place if encase she doesn't take it too nicely. Castiel's relationship with daphine seems way too forced on the show and I personally think cas alsway tought of her as some tought of friend…**

**"****Please let me have this Castiel" ****she cut him as she stepped closer to him looking dejected, lonely and desperate for some sort of physical attention, he went up to her, slowly but hesitantly kissed back it didn't feel right to do this, but who was he to not give her the comfort that she desperately seeks? like I said before **_**I tried to make this paragraph and below seem like is forced and uncomfortable like on the show with daphine touching cas's cheek everthing just seemed way to forced and uncomfortable or is just me? ?**_

**Please review, comment**

**:D**

**xoxo**

**nikki**


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